Hm

It's like

running,

stopping for some rest,

and not being able to run again.

Merry Christmas

Joyeux Noel
Froehliche Weihnachten
Buone Feste Natalizie
Feliz Navidad
즐거운 성탄절 보내세요

Different ways to say: Happy Birthday, Jesus!

I guess I'll write a post at the end of the day about how my Christmas went, but on this one I want to share what went down Christmas Eve! 12/24/2009 was by far the most spontaneous, fun and adventurous Eve ever. For me, it all started when Lucy texted me in the morning saying 'I'm coming over with the brownie mix.' I didn't know whether to take her seriously or not, but I decided to clean my house (something I never ever do). Christine suggested taking the Metro to my house (LOL), but I guess Lucy freaked out like crazy. Well, luck was on our side this merry merry day; Lucy's mom was able to drop Lucy and Christine off at my house and save them the trouble/hysteria. When they come over, we ate and ate and ate. My spaghetti wasn't as good as I hoped (not enough ingredients >:( ), but we had cake and tangerines! After leaving people video comments on facebook, we went upstairs and had real talk. I realized I was the blindest and most naive one of that group, sigh. Bitter epiphany, I guess? Time for some accurate, constantly analyzing, smart brain action.

Anyway, at around six we decided to get out of my house. We weren't entirely sure on what to do, but NRB thwarted the other options (hehe). It felt so good to just sing, carefree about everything else. It was so fun that we ended up staying for two hours, when we had originally planned to stay for one hour.

Spending Christmas Eve with Lucy and Christine made me realize what the 'Christmas Spirit' is all about. It's not about writing cute letters to Santa, or exchanging Christmas presents (although I miss both of the above traditions). It's about spending time with your family, friends, people you love, and never forgetting the real reason for the love and the joy of this season.

The power;

Good news calls for a brand new post.

I never understood the power of prayer to its fullest extent. Realistically speaking, of course I still don't grasp the power in entirety. But every time He answers, I get a step closer to tasting the true beauty of prayer.

I'm finally getting Sundays off of work. Honestly, I haven't been praying about this as consistently as I should have. How He answered my prayer so quickly and with such ease shows His eagerness to see me at the dwelling place once again. He heard my prayer and the conjoined voices of those who prayed for me. Thank you--YOU!

It's funny how things work out. It all started when I told my boss about the WVC retreat...Yeah, and things definitely fell into place.

This will take some time though, since I must help train the new worker who will take my Sunday shift. Hopefully I will come out to church sometime in January.

He favors, really. I'm amazed.

It's time

For another blog post.

It was indeed too heavy for me.

Lucy, remember the marathon/race analogy?
I guess this is where I say "I told you so".
Although I wish I wasn't so sure of it myself.

Psalm 23
Matthew 18: 10-13

Hey

I was always here. I am still here. I will be here forever.

If you were wondering, I mean.

I feel as if winter break will pass by like nothing. What will it take to just cling onto highschool, the bittersweet memories and the seemingly blissful ignorance? I doubt that college life will disappoint, but I know I can't absorb and adapt to all these changes peacefully. It's going to take a lot of work, a lot of patience, and a lot of encouragement.

That's a part of the reason I want to stay close to home. That really does eliminate many of the options (to my disadvantage), but the thought of driving 10 hours just to see my family really upsets me. And I know time flies, but to me four years in college seems way too long. Another thing is the new environment and new friends. I love meeting new people, I really do. But I hate the thought of being away from my friends here.

Oh well. I'll try my best.

Now it's in your hands.

Did it die?

How come people don't update their blogs as frequently now? Ah. Oh well. Once again at the school library, attempting to plan the rest of the day out. I have an Econ. free response final tomorrow, but I'm probably coming back to school for choir's Christmas performance (Lucy, Amy and Christine are singing!). Maybe after the performance the Christmas season fever will finally hit me.

C H R I S T mas.

It's cold outside

...And so begins my semi-daily routine of updating JUICY at the school library.

-I'm craving corn bread.

-Sunshine tomorrow (though it's High 52°F...)

-I miss HERD.

-A few more days of school, and then I'm a free spirit. Temporarily, I guess.

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."

-Henry David Thoreau

Almost over.

We're almost done with high school. Wow first semester of senior year went by so fast...It's depressing. Now I'm constantly thinking of how my life will turn out in these next few months, what I'll make out of my life, and who I'll share it with. I can't keep thinking about all my friends in high school, and all the bittersweet memories. Do they last? I'd like to think so, but I know in reailty I won't keep in touch with many that I believed were dear to me. Well on the bright side, if we do K.I.T. then you must've been a good good friend :)

Donuts

Donuts at 12:25 AM = Priceless.

So after watching Ninja Assassin--the bloodiest movie I've seen by far--Paul, Yohan and I decided to go pick Christine up. Yohan and Paul raced (kinda) to Topanga, but of course Paul won. HAH. And after we drove all the way to Topanga, we found out that the stores were opening at 5 AM (sigh). So we found two carts and Yohan suggested that we race with the carts, but unfortunately those carts were broken (oh well). Then Yohan stole Christine's cellphone, which she had to trade back by giving him her shoes. 

So when Paul took us to Earl's donuts, Christine had to walk in barefeet. Heh.

Those donuts were prettyyy good.

Philosopher King

Take away the complaint "I have been harmed," and the harm is taken away.
-M.A.

I love my English class, though sometimes I can't help but wonder how many of the philosophers, poets and writers I learn about actually lived true to their words and principles.

allegory of the cave (P)

I feel like the prisoner. No, not the escaped, enthusiastic, enlightened prisoner. Not even close. I feel like one of the many, one of the many that are still chained in the cave. I'm scared of how the sun will blind me, but I know that the world outside is incomparable to my world.

I used to think ignorance was bliss. How wrong of me, how flawed and how selfish. Ignorance, bilss? Nope. It's okay, though. A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds (RWE). I love knowing everything and yet nothing (S).

I love my friends. They feel for me, the kind of special vicarous outrages or joys whenever I share my personal experiences and dilemmas.

dreams?

I had the funniest dream yesterday. It makes me laugh just thinking about it, and it's even funnier because Alice Kang thinks it's actually possible. Though of course I hope it won't come true. Oh boy.

I love working with Alice, she's too funny. We talk about the strangest things, make the weirdest faces at each other, and end up cracking up like crazy. I love Sundays, even though it seems as if a lot of weird customers come just to annoy us.

Battle Studies

Sexy. Hearbreak warfare, All we ever do is say Goodbye, Who says, Half of my Heart, Edge of Desire, Do You Know Me, Perfectly Lonely, Asssassin, Crossroads, Friends Lovers or Nothing, War of My Life. Good job JM, I love Battle Studies as much as Continuum. <3


November is a busy month. Oh well, I still have faith in myself. I can finish everything in time :)

I'm the luckiest person in the world. Today I was at the library trying to finish the physics project, and when the bell rang I forgot to take my USB Flash drive (with my project inside!). But before I even realized this stupid mistake, someone came to my 4th period and dropped it off. How nice of them. <3

-Tomorrow = all school work + college work + real work at TLJ.
So Lucy, stop begging me to play Crazy Arcade with you ALL night until 3 am. That's not going to happen. I'm sleeping by 12 am today.


Here's something that always makes my day:
So I have a friend named Min Kim. He's a fellow immigrant. When he first came to America, he wanted to choose a manly English name. Guess what he chose? Susan. <3 I'm sorry I can't take you seriously now and randomly start cracking up right in front of your face. I can't help it. :)


I want November to pass. I want December to pass. I want 2010.

Love Today

Doom, da da-di da-di, doom, da da-di da-di
Everybody's gonna love today
Gonna love today, gonna love today
Everybody's gonna love today, gonna love today
Anyway you want to, anyway you've got to
Love love me, love love me, love love

Yesterday, I had fun. Today, I'll have a blast. I'm excited to go to that sandwich shop in Valencia :)

I feel so tired right now, even after ten hours of sleep. I think I need another nap.

I love spontaneity. I love free spirits.

Life is fun if you make the most out of it. I never realized this until senior year. Amidst anxious seniors perfecting their college applications, I congratulate myself for my calmness. But I feel a little too relaxed... Odd.


Crazy Arcade is a crazy fun game. It was so intense playing with my brother (my game hero) and Lucy (who killed herself quite often..) Well, starting my day by playing Crazy Arcade was good. Though it did make me sleepy after awhile, because we repeated the same situations (Lucy dies first, due to her own mistake -> me and my brother play and defeat some monsters -> i die -> brother saves us -> we win).

Green Light

I love John Legend.



















I've got it good, real good.
But I never stop and give thanks for how blessed I am.
There's always "more" out there.
How can I ever be truly happy?

Paparazzi

I love this song.

I'm your biggest fan, I'll follow you until you love me,
Papa-paparazzi
Baby there's no other superstar you know that I'll be your
Papa-paparazzi
Promise I'll be kind, but i won't stop until that boy is mine,
Baby you'll be famous, chase you down until you love me,
Papa-paparazzi

Boo. Well, that was a little off topic from what I wanted to blog about.
I haven't been updating for awhile (as Legendary pointed out). I wonder where my love for blogging and writing went? I hoped that I'd update my blog consistently, and that I wouldn't lose the flame...Oh well, it isn't too late to get back on track.

So I read Paul's blog "Three Musketeers" and I barfed a little. I mean really? Think of your past relationships, you do NOT want a princess-servant type of relationship. Stop ignoring my advice. I don't want to hear you saying "Oh my goodness I do everything and she does nothing" AGAIN! You need to go for the mature ones, and you know it. I do not approve. Well you can just ignore me on this one, and the next time you're really against something I'm doing I'll have that blank check in hand.

And stop writing about girls. You sound desperate.

Well besides that, I loved reading everyone else's blog posts :)

And I got my new computer today! Actually, I woke up to my mom saying "JOANNE your computer is here". It made me very happy, but I was pretty groggy while setting up the computer.

I love it. It's so new, so fast, so pretty, so cool, so clean. I wonder how long that'll last, but hopefully I'll be able to keep this computer safe. It's like getting that shiny new toy, I guess. You anticipate it, go crazy for it, can't stop thinking about it and once you have it in your hands it loses its value. How can I stop myself from that type of fickleness?

Real love > the chase.

i love you guys

for the best birthday weekend ever.

Even though on Thursday my trusty four-year old computer died (sigh), Friday and Saturday more than just made-up for everything and anything bad that ever happened the past week.

So here's just a little something for you guys:


Dear Friends,

Thank you. You guys are lovely, sweet, cute, funny and awesome. I loved the kpop Birthday card (only if it were true), hello kitty balloon + framed memories, cupcakes, roses, red velvet cake, donuts (trying to make me fat or something?! haha), BANANA NUT MUFFINS, fudge brownies, resistance, and all the birthday wishes!


And the surprise party. You guys are good... Eh, I guess kudos to Michelle, not for almost giving the surprise away but for her effort. And damn paul, you are a good liar. I keep thinking about on Friday when I asked you "Are you and Michelle planning something?!" and your response was so nonchalant. Anyway, you guys are the best. Rachel and I were very happy and it makes us (? haha) smile whenever we think about it.

You guys help me to reflect.

Thank you

Where's my sun?

Yesterday, Lucy and I shared a fun conversation.
Topic? Boys, of course.

I want to share with you what this funny, down-to-earth girl said:

kabamitslucy (12:07:30 AM): whatever you're doing with that boy
kabamitslucy (12:07:38 AM): is what you're doing with someone else's husband.

I guess this is true, to a certain extent. BUT, whatever happened to high school sweethearts? Am I dwelling in the past? I mean I totally agree to what Lucy said. Though it is a little depressing and cynical.

I want to prove this girl wrong, and I have less than one year to do it! Hahahahehehe.

Stunning

oh no

I ordered more urban outfitters clothes online. Uh oh.

Well, the "$75 and over FREE SHIPPING" deal was ending!......

I know.

I have a problem.
I have a problem.
I have a problem.
I have a problem.
I have a problem.

Enough of that.

I'm sure Paul, Rachel and Edwin experienced a very unique and thrilling Monday.
Well, aren't we all in a series of unfortunate events?
At first, my day was lovely:
-I wore a fur jacket to school, warm warm warm.
-Went out to Ralphs for Lunch with Michelle Park.
-Paul, Edwin and I went to TUTTI FRUTTI afterschool to get some delicious froyo.
-My dad picked me up, and he bought us IN N OUT. Yummy, great.

And it was good.

It all started when I went to deposit some cash into my checking account. Long story short, the ATM ate my Benjamin.

If I don't see the transaction show up in my online banking account tomorrow, things will get ugly!

the sun will always rise

A sunflower moves in response to the location of the sun--heliotropism. 

When the sun goes down, the sunflower bows its head and gradually turns eastward in anticipation of the rising sun.

I like to think of people as sunflowers. We all have something--whether that may be a person, an object, or a feeling--that we derive our energy from. All of us have a personal sun.

Now when our suns go down, I guess we bow our heads too. We search for direction, we anticipate the sun, and at some point we just give up. But just remember, the sun will always rise in the morning.

I love sunflowers.

/EDIT: I saw a sunflower today, hence this random post.

compLANEYing

I bet Laney will get a kick out of this one.

So as you may assume from the title, today wasn't one of my best days. I woke up an hour later than I planned, but thankfully Mr. Ramon is always okay with students coming in a few minutes late. Rushing in the morning and coming to school with wet hair (especially in this fall weather) aren't the best ways to start your day; though, this part is entirely my fault.

The worst part of the day was my mosquito bite, which is precisely two inches in diameter and located near my knee. It hurts, itches, annoys, irritates, drives me insane, etc. For the past hour I've been relieving the pain with some ice cubes--not the best idea, since I'm prone to getting sick when my body temperature falls (mosquito allergies, poor immune system..why?!).

Actually, I think I got an extra gift (a bite on my foot) from my mosquito friends from the Getty Villa too...

THE GETTY VILLA, MALIBU:

Hands down, one of the most beautiful art museum I have ever visited. Michelle and I were practically ooing and cooing when we saw this part of the Getty Villa (pictured above). I think they did a pretty good job of imitating Greek architecture (of course I've never been to Greece, so I can't make an accurate critique of the buildings). We didn't have enough time to visit all the exhibits, but in two weeks (October 14) Mr. Ramon is taking us on a field trip to the Villa so it's all good =)

PEACE by Aristophanes:

My very first impression of the play were "vulgar, perverse, gross." Not that we weren't warned about how offensive Aristophanes's plays would be, but of course Michelle and I were never exposed to such, for the lack of better words, crudeness. When Ramon told us it would be vulgar, we were thinking in terms of profanity and racial slurs. Oh, how wrong we were.

Enough about first impressions. I really enjoyed the message and idea behind Aristophanes's play; I opened my mind to the actual content when the actors held a Q&A with the audience. The fact that the actors chose Peace in such times is admirable and bold. "It's our personal anti-war protest." Haha, I liked that.

So I guess my day wasn't so bad after all.. =)

I am

exhausted.

Who

What

Where

When

Why

How

This boy

By James Morrison

I'm still here, 
But it hasn't been easy, 
I'm sure that you had your reasons, 
I'm scared for this emotion, 
For years I've been holding it down, 
For years I've been holding it down. 

This girl tries her best everyday, 
But it's all gone to waste 'cause there's no one around, 
This girl she can draw she can paint, 
Likes to dance she can skate, 
Now she don't make a sound. 

We'll play in our park, 
'Till it's too dark for us to see
Well we'll make our way home, 
With mud on our clothes, 
She won't be pleased. 

I'm still here, 
But it hasn't been easy, 
I'm sure that you had your reasons, 
I'm scared for this emotion, 
For years I've been holding it down, 

And I,
Love to forgive and forget, 
So I, 
Try to put all this behind us, 
Just, 
Know that my arms are wide open, 
The older I get, the more that I know. 

Well it's time to let this go. 
I got to let it go

???

My blogs sound like college essays?

Is that bad?

Maybe I should change my blogging style.

i love

MUSIC. Wow, I am experiencing an "epiphany" right now. No, not just a sudden realization or an "AHA moment" (excuse my Ramonism), but more like Plato's Allegory of the Cave type of epiphany. Music: it is so good, so sweet, so refreshing (Laney, this is where you say "finally, you sheepish plebeian").

I always thought of myself as a mainstream music type of person, and I accepted myself for it. Now, I feel really lame and ignorant about not truly appreciating the blissful world of  non-mainstream (?) music. Actually, this is all thanks to you guys (Laney, Ben, Paul and Michelle) and your sweet playlists. Recently I've been listening to more talented artists--Priscilla Ahn, Ingrid Michaelson, James Morrison (a bit mainstream, but not too much) and NERD.

I know I'm a little bit behind on this evolution from the "middle school kiis fm love" to real, real, music; but hey, I'm glad anyway. So for now, no more (well, only for awhile): Ne-yo, Keri Hilson, Taylor Swift, and any other artist that frequents the Kiis fm "top songs" list. Oh, and definitely no K-pop (except the ones they play at Tous Les Jours, I guess).

My new (except for The Beatles, everyone's all-time favorite band; I'll love them forever) favorites:

P.S. All of you I mentioned up there must compile a super playlist for me.

I MUST

- Start watching The Office. I saw a youtube video of it today and it totally made me laugh :)

- Start exercising! How many times do I say this, and end up not following through..?

- Sleep at 10 pm today.. Please

- Give my dog some water.

- Make some new friends, just because!

- Force myself to drink at least six cups of water per day.

- Keep myself informed about basketball and well-known athletes. I didn't know who Derek Fisher was until this week, sad.

- UPDATE MY ITUNES

- Buy Anooooooooby some snacks, and laney some healthy food.

Just a thought.

<----- I'm wearing pants that I stole from my grandma in Korea. Nice, right? It's the most comfortable thing ever. It's long enough to protect me from vicious mosquitoes too. 

Thank goodness we can still feel the Californian sun; thinking of the dreadful, cold winter and how many vitamin c tablets I will take is really unpleasant. But, I'll just enjoy the good weather for now.

Today in Statistics we watched a video on Andrew Wiles, a professor at Princeton and a well-known mathematician. It was about his life long dream of proving Fermat's Last Theorem, which took him seven years to do; only, his proof was flawed. These people really make me think about having, or trying to have, a purposeful life. Where do they get these inspirations? Where do they begin? Where will their goals, if accomplished, take them?

So my recent knowledge of Mr. Wiles and the epics (Gilgamesh and Achilles) we have been reading in Ramon's class are challenging my views on well, everything. Like what really motivated Gilgamesh and Achilles to be the great men that they were (according to the epics), when they both understood and believed that all men and women are equal in death? Especially since these two come from cultures that don't believe in real consequences or rewards in the afterlife for having morals (or lacking them),  like I do.

Anyway, this is just a thought.

something new

I wanted to escape the routine of just getting a vanilla soy latte or caramel macchiato, so I tried something new today: Iced Green Tea Latte. Don't judge by it's looks; it's definitely one of the most delicious tea drinks that I have ever had. It kind of tastes like drinking melted vanilla ice cream, with the unmistakable green tea "scent". It isn't too sweat, and it isn't bitter at all (something you'd expect for tea). Plus, you get to convince yourself that you're trying something healthy; a healthy mind leads to a healthy body =).

Speaking of healthy body, I need to get some exercise. Some sleep would be nice too.

I miss summer, even the blazing weather.

my vice

No, not just a sale. An Urban Outfitter sale! Right now, I feel like Rebecca Bloomwood (shout out to fellow Confessions of a Shopaholic readers, Michp).

To shop or not to shop? It seems so trivial or even stupid thinking about this, but sales are ruining my life. I'm spending way too much money on my debit card, no! I must be frugal, I must be sensible, I must be sharp. MUST.

Every time Urban Outfitters has some type of sale or event like this, I can't help but to be consumed by it. I can rarely keep the promises I make to myself every time I get a paycheck: No, not this month. No spending on unnecessary things. But then, I start to think (a disadvantage to myself, really)...clothes aren't unnecessary at all. I mean, the more the merrier, right? You always need more clothes. Always.

And now that the season is changing, I'm going to be tempted to buy some of their gorgeous yet overpriced"late fall catalog" items. Like, for example, this bag: Isn't it gorgeous? The best part is, its on sale too! $68 to $39, amazing. I know that sometime this week, I will fall into UO's temptations and look at what's on sale, probably building up my wishlist in agony. (Hey, none of you better get this bag. It's mine ;))

I have a problem. But hey, the first step is to simply admit it.
Can somebody teach me what the next part is? Please.

my cuties

I seriously have the cutest dog in the world, Lucky:

Can't say the same for my cat though, Chanel:

They're on my mind a lot lately. Lucky has this skin problem these days; I think it's because it's been so hot this summer. Hopefully it gets better :(

And my troublesome cat is pregnant, I think she'll give birth soon. Thus the tiring task of giving away the kittens begins:

A 2 weeks notice

Actually, a one month notice. I told my boss (Tous Les Jours) that I wanted to quit, finally. But then my good friend Alice also brought up that she wanted to quit, so rescheduling was pretty mind boggling.

I guess in one month, I'll be free! I wish I could leave sooner, but since the manager said he could take out all my weekday shifts I think I can survive. No more bakery, no more mean customers, YES!

But now, I have to find a kid I can tutor. Hopefully I can find a job in one of those korean tutoring places like Elite or Enopi. I have to review some basic math and biology, anyway. (p.s. maybe Michelle can take my place at Tous Les Jours! haha).

I didn't expect senior year to be this busy, at all. I don't think I'll be able to have any fun until this semester ends, unfortunately. For now, it's SAT prep (ha) and college applications. Hopefully next semester I'll be able to take a breather.

Oh, the joys of being a senior.

By the way, look! A double piercing:

A first for everything.

Okay, it's a little bit odd to start blogging again after Xanga (every Asian had one at one point in their lives). It probably won't be as JUICY as the blog title suggests, but bear with me!

So senior year has been a mixture of excitement and disappointment, of laughter and tears. I can already tell that this year will be the most difficult, most challenging and most grandeur year of high school. The amount of coursework is equal to that of junior year's, bummer. But I can't deny that the senior privileges, like leaving for lunch (getting real food), is awesome. Except, I've only done it once because Rachel hasn't got her lunch pass yet!

Anyway, I just wanted to establish what I expect of myself and this year, in this personal blog of mine. First, I will not be an example of senioritis. I guess my "bad" study habits won't go away, but I promise I will not be dumb enough to throw away everything I've gained. Second, I want to keep in even closer touch with my closet friends (HERD + my bestfriends). Lastly, I want to enjoy this. I want to enjoy my year. Especially since I'm applying to schools all over the country, it's depressing to think that this may be the last year in California. I'm going to soak up all the sun that I can, literally and metaphorically.

Basically, these items are what occupy my mind:

College, college, grades, college, friends, friendship, college, California.

Yeah, I need a break.
Let's do something fun, oh followers :)